Society’s standards

Society has a timeline of what you “should do” and “when it should be done.”

When I was 18 I took my driving test. Everyone my age was doing it, so I did it too. I failed 4 times. It was around this time that I was diagnosed with depression and was put on medication.

If I had understood my mental health then as I do today, I would have stopped the lessons and waited until I was feeling better. Instead, I was pushing myself because I had to be like my peers. I felt like a failure. How are they able to do this and I am not? Is something wrong with me because they passed with ease, but I cannot control my nerves?

I was so ashamed. So disappointed. With myself, my body and my mind.

Now, at 30 years old I have passed my driving test - at a time that was right for me. I got into that car feeling confident and believing in my abilities, even though it was scary!

So what did I take away from this? There’s no timeline you should follow.

There is only you, and what you feel is right for YOU.

According to society’s rules, I “should” have:

A husband and children

A house that I own

A car

A well paid job

Well…instead of those things, I have my driving license and I’ve just become single following 12 years of romantic relationships. So no, I don’t have a husband and kids. I don’t have a house that I own. But I do rent the most beautiful flat. I do have a well paid job, but instead of continuing down that path, I am on the verge of a new career.

And I couldn’t be happier!

So there is no such a thing as a timeline.

I encourage you to listen to your heart, and ask yourself:

What is it that I have always really wanted to do?

Is there one thing I have always said I will do one day?

Go and do it!

Break free from the routine. Stop thinking of your life in terms of what you ‘should’ be doing or what is ‘normal’.

Trust your instincts and stay true to what makes YOU happy.